Friday 31 October 2008

I'm writing this from under the table. Or at least I would be if the flippin router would work so I could take Lollys laptop off and hide somewhere from the kids rampaging around this house. The ethernet cable or its port keeps losing the connection, I've tried all the four cables I have so I guess its the port which means calling the cable company to try and get a new modem, hope to be online wirelessly by this time next year...

Today I have Dumpling (7) Ben (4) and Steven (7), foam discs are flying past my head as I speak, various things are being rammed under the microscope to be examined, the four year old is whining every 3 seconds because he only want to do what the older boys are doing. None of the hundreds of pounds of toys are of any interest, "let me see, let me see, let me see" is all I can hear. Lolly forgot to take the cat up with her last night, his litter tray and food are in her room, so he stayed downstairs and pooed on the lounge floor, no one noticed until Steven trod in it (that boy could find poo in a sterile room) then the smell made everyone gag and scream, mostly me as I scraped it off the carpet and work to work on the stain with some antibacterial wipes. Yuck, the smell is in my nostrils and I'm gagging like I'm 8 weeks pregnant (I'm not, dont even start) I just cant believe no one saw it until it was trodden on, every time I sent Steven home, I have to apologise for some kind of poo having been on him that day and been scrubbed off, he even managed to get it on him when we went to the park, a non dog park, a park that has a problem with drunk teenagers, a park that has be locked at tea time till morning because of said teenagers. I do not want to think what kind of poo it was, though you and I know...bleaugghhh. At every sink in this house is a variety of anti-bac cleansing wipes, gels, sprays, I hate poop yet find myself surrounded by dog, cat, chicken, rabbit and toddler poop, not to mention that visiting kids here seem to busy to flush. Ack.

Moving on, the chickens are barely laying, not surprising as they seem to have chosen this cold snap to moult, even the ones who should have started laying last week are just wandering around the garden, eating me out of house and home. To think there was a time when every family member, neighbour and visitor left with a box of eggs, now I dont even have two for breakfast!

The two under two on wednesday is going very well, I find little ones easier than older ones. I'm having a real issue with the older ones not respecting my things or the toys we have. Anyway, the littles one eat in high chairs so they cant wander around spreading crumbs and smears, they nap in travel cots and the sit snuggly in blankets in the pushchair and wave at passersby when we go out. I dont have to tell them to get down from the top of the play structures in the park, they are happy to toddle round in the leaves and the baby be pushed gently in the baby swings. They delight in the simplest things rather than demanding to know where the playstation is, we dont have one and its such fun to see the look of confusion on their faces when I tell them so and that we have no intention of ever getting one. I dont know why I enjoy it so much, maybe because the smaller they are the cuter they are and because I feel more in control of the situation.

Thursday 23 October 2008

Gale force winds here, all blowing against me on the way home from school, at least I got in before the rain started.

***

Making 4 boards for the school tea towel, eather has the logo, date, year and classes and their self portrait. One per year, 90 faces on each, thats a lot of sticking but they have to be done and sent off tomorrow, which will already be late as they ask for extra time for printing before christmas.

***

Two new chickens arrived today but their house and run isnt coming for a few days as the previous owners are still moving house. Had no choice but to put them straight in with the other flock but after some initial feather ruffling, they seem to have settled in. Not laying so much, two are recovering from being ill, the weather is cold and they could do with growing a few more feathers for the winter, eggs come last in the energy supplies dept!

***

Nemos incessant barking and sometime bad behaviour has been a stressful problem for me, cant afford one of those collars that sprays them with lemon scent when they bark but someone suggest a hand held water spray for when he is misbehaving. Its great, doesnt hurt him but he doesnt like it and I know only have to look at the bottle and then him and he drops his head and walks away!

***

Two new little brothers started yesterday, they are 11 months and just under two. They will be here 9-5 on wednesdays, maybe other days when the mum see's how she feels being back at work. Very good and they settled straight in, but hard work, with the older kids at least you can go for a pee and trust they wont get up to much, I barely had time to breathe with those two!

Tuesday 21 October 2008

Blah. Busy, busy, busy but dont seem to get anything done, I write lists and then lose them, I'm doing just about enough of most things but nothing properly!

***

Dumplings 7th birthday last week! Cant believe he is 7! Riot of a party, never again will I invite 7 friends, all boys to my house, had to lose my temper and shout very loudly as they were physically ripping my lounge apart at one point "WOULD YOU BEHAVE LIKE THIS IN YOUR HOME OR AT SCHOOL?" 7 stunned faces stared at me and shook their heads, soon after that I took them to the park up the road as my house just couldnt contain that much energy!

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Having bloggers block, cant think of a single thing to write that would interest you, be back later! x

Sunday 12 October 2008

dog pee-ed on my sofa.

Why?

Why would my dog who spent all evening with me in the garden and got a walk up the the chinese take away, pee on my sofa? All the cushions and cover are in the wash but the base unit smells of pee despite me scrubbing at it with carpet spray and antibacterial spray. Its an old sofa which I used to have sentimental feelings for but not now it smells of pee! So I may clean it up the best I can and give it away on freecycle and get another smaller one from freecycle.

We're giving a home to two more chickens and they are giving us the house and run, yay! Been moving things around the garden and rotating the runs, I'm an impatient gardener and want things to grow now, if I had the money I would buy ready grown turf and flowers, I get bored of parts of the garden looking a mess while I wait a season for them to recover from whatever the chickens/dog/cat/children did to them. I also need a weekly skip to take away the rubbish of leaves, apples and branches we have to keep cutting dwon, both compost bins are filled tho the brim, we have weekly bonfires and we still have so much to get rid of!

I found an egg behind the compost bins last night and knew by its size and shape that one of the silkie crosses had laid it months ago, curiousity got the better of me as I have never experienced a bad egg so I cracked it open into a compost bin, WWWWAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHH, the stink had all of us running from the garden, even the dog looked shocked and smells like that come from his nether regions all the time!

Friday 10 October 2008

My chinchilla collapsed in her cage this morning and died in my hands. Lolly knows as I rang her at school, they will be lots of people here when she gets home and I didnt want to tell her in front of them. Dumpling doesnt know, I have to tell him when he comes out of school as I have my 5 year niece and 4 year old Ben with me and I dont want him to hear it from them.

Wednesday 8 October 2008

I got all the way home before realising that I had left my bag with my purse and keys in the park...Luckily it was still there, never been so glad to see a small cotton bag!

Feel really unsettled today and have worked out why, I normally keep myself to myself but have had to deal directly with over 10 people today for various reasons, and although everything went well I'm left feeling weird, I keep running over all the conversations I've had in my head, making sure I said all the right things, I'm such a people pleaser that I worry about what I've said and how I've come across!

I still have to see my dad and my sister tonight, feel exhausted, too much human contact, prefer to be with my kids, chickens and dog!
you know when you're having a great day, really productive and one person kills it with just a look? I've been workig at Dumplings school all morning, trying to get the school website working again and then working at the book fayre. I forgot to sign out and did remember till I got to the school gates so went back so as not to break fire regulations, no one was in the office to buzz me through so I tapped on the glass doors for one of the support workers to let me in, she did it with such arrogence and disgust, physically looking down through her glasses, I thanked her and explained that I just needed to sign at and she just glared at me. As I left I said goodbye and thanked her again for opening the door but she refused to even look at me, I dont know what I ever did to upset this woman, working in the school for the PTA is a weird thing, everyones nice but theres a sense of not quite belonging. I was working on the pc in the staff room after the IT guy had shown me a few things and set me up with my own user name, the staff started a conversation about a child and then quickly shut up when one pointed to me (I had my back to the room but screen are reflective...)I know they have confidential issues but I've taken on a position of responsibility and am crb checked, I'm not going to abuse my voluntary position. I guess like many other PTA members around the world I'm feeling undervalued for the work we do out of our own time, we have raised so much money and done so much for the school but I dont think many people realise, I guess the teachers feel the same way about their work and we have to com ei under that!

Monday 6 October 2008

Havnt done a meme for ages so heres one taken from Mary P's blog

If I looked on the bed next to you what would I find?

umm, nope, thats under my pillow, err by morning you would find my six year old son, starts off in his own bed but always ends up in mine by dawn.

Do you go to the bathroom with the door open or closed?

Open, its ridiculous, I once breastfed by son on the toilet because thats the only way he would stop crying and I couldnt relax enough to go with him screaming! If I close the door the kids panic and think something is wrong

Are your underwear and socks folder neatly or just thrown in?

I have to admit thrown in, every few weeks I sort it out into neat piles but the next time I come up the stairs with piles of laundry I just throw it in again!

Sleep on your back or stomach?

Never on my tummy, just couldnt, so side or back, luckily I dont snore on my back!

What would I find if I looked under your bed?

Gah, dust, to much crap, my waxing stuff, chocolate wrapper, a microscope kit that I keep meaning to give to my son but dont trust him with all that glass, books, lost shoes, its awful and I want one of those beds that the whole top bit of the bed lifts up and reveals a huge storage cupboard, for some reason I would keep that tidy because its contained but I cant keep open areas tidy?

Name something that happened today to make you angry?

My son showed off and was loud and silly while I was working at the book fayre at his school, he feels the need to show off in front of other children and it really winds me up. He didnt get an after school snack and thats a big punishment for him!

What were you doing before this survey?

what wasnt I doing? putting the chickens away, finding a place in my garden for a hedgehog that the local kids found in the road, trying to get my kids to put their plates in the dishwasher, talking to my mum on the phone, one of my usual busy evenings after a busy day! I never stop yet it never all gets done!

What will I do after this survey?

Keep going till I'm too tired

Marriage or living together?

lol, any one who knows me Will know this is neither, never!

Do you sing?

yes
badly

Do you de-label your beer bottles?

Never drink beer, never drink any alcohol at home, seems a waste, only going to suffer a hangover if its been a wild night before and that doesnt happen any more!

Do you talk about your feelings or hide them?

Talk about them usually with my mum, we talk about anything and everything everyday

Is there something you regret or wish you could take back?

Yes, just one. I was standing in a bus station a few years ago when I saw a very large woman walk past, I said in a quiet voice to my sister "At least when I feel fat I can say I'm not as fat as that" she looked at me in horror as I hadnt realised that the shop assistant from a shop I go to every week was standing behind me and she is very large. Every time I see her I want to apologise but dont know if she actually heard me so if I did I might make it worse...?

First thing you do when you wake up?

Pass wind

Ever had surgery?

stitches in my eyelid when I was 4, appendix out when I was nine, all four wisdom teeth out when I was 30, I was the biggest wuss for the last one

last argument you got into?

Within the last half hour with Lolly about why she wouldnt put the dogs bowl down from the chair to the floor when he was barking for it, one of those pointless, tired mother/defiant teenager fights when you find your self telling her off for the way she is speaking and realise thats exactly the way you are too

Do you rip the paper from water bottles?

Yes, cant help myself.

Whats the best thing about your best friend?

(This answer was actually cut and pasted from Mary P's blog because its exactly what I would have said!)
The conversation just flows. (The worst thing is her stupid boyfriend. DUMP him, DUMP him!)

How long does it take you to fall asleep at night?

10-15 minutes, I never actually remember falling asleep, I think and think and then suddenly its morning

Current song on myspace?

huh? I'm not on myspace and dont know anyone who is

When you shut off the alarm clock do you fall back asleep?

I set my alarm for 6am, wake Lolly for school and the go back for bed till 7am, hitting the snooze button every ten minutes, I like knowing that I'm getting to stay in bed

If given the chance would you look after a monkey for the weekend?

oh yes, I would love one, and they wouldnt get it back! We currently have a dog, a cat, a chinchilla, 2 lovebirds, 4 rabbits and 10 chickens!

What are you looking forward to in the next few months?

having the real fire going

If you could have any one in the world?

Daniel Craig - Blond Bond

My christmas list?

1 terabyte external hard drive
new coop and run for the chickens
a sunny holiday, havtn been abroad since before Lolly was born

where would you go shopping new york?

I dont know, dont know whats there, I'm not into spending lots of money on one things, I'd find the bargain shops!

You need new jeans, which shop?

Primark, my entire wardrobe including underwear, shoes and bags, its the only shop I can afford!

How do you feel about your hair?

Loving my new do! wish I'd had the guts do it years ago, so easy to look after! Its a chin length, katie holmes style, will post a pic soon

whats in your dvd player?

teletubbies, I once found £1.43 in my video player, it worked better after that!

If you could move away where would you go?

I wouldnt, I would never want to start again, finding my way round, making new friends, couldnt do, I live in a nice area, am very pleased with my kids schools, wouldnt change it

Best thing happened to you today?

Chatted to the blue eyed, young deputy head master of my sons school, just nice to chat to a man of my age in a safe situation!

What would you change about your life?

More money so I wouldnt have to keep putting important things off till 'next week'

Whats the best feeling in the world?

When my kids, dog and cat are all asleep on me on the sofa late at night on weekends, I feel loved and trusted

Wednesday 1 October 2008

I....MUST...LEARN...HOW...TO...SAY...NO!

I was in the school office today printing thankyou letters for the cake sale when the office staff started talkng loudly about how short they were for lunchtime supervisors and how you had to already be CRB checked and I realise by the eyes boring into the back of my head that the conversation is being directed at me.
"Umm, I cant help until after half term and I cant do wednesdays and I'd like to do casual cover, how much do you think you would need me roughly?"
"Everyday except Wednesdays?"
Great, not sure about the application form though, you have to give all medical details and with my back problems I'm not sure they will hire me and the flip side is that my doctor will say my back cant be that bad if I can work in the school? I'm sat here with one shoulder and the side of my back in spasm, its painful but I can move and with painkillers can smile too? What do I do, at 33 I dont want to be written off but at the same time I'm afraid of making my back worse?

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