8 of us went for pizza last night, 3 of us and five of them. To anyone watching we were just one big family, we chatted and laughed. I encouraged Lolly to go on the dance mats in the arcade with her dads wife (as she will be known, dont push it) I dont know how I feel, part of me is happy for Lolly and I'm relieved that his plans to support Lolly will mean that I'm not living hand to mouth worrying about it but another part of me feels defeated. Nothing we ever argued about has been resolved, I guess we just got tired of it and its different now we know each other for real. We're just ignoring the elephant in the room that is he knew I was pregnant and just left the country and never looked back. He went on to meet his wife, marry her and have children assuming that I had 'sorted' the situation he left behind. But its a long time ago, I dont feel any emotion towards him, good or bad. But a small part of me would like recognition that he was wrong to do what he did.