I'm stupid; Reasons 1 & 2

I'm slobbing round this house while it rains and rains and rains, wearing tracksuit/pyjamas, have no intention of going out. Keep halfheartedly starting chores and tidying up but know that with kids being kept inside by the weather then there really is no point. Keep hearing a clicking sound, think it may be the rain dripping on something outside, dismiss it. Keep on plodding around, pluck my eyebrows in the mirror, wish I never started doing them so severely, blame beauty college (did you know I'm a qualified beauty therapist?) Hearing clicking sound again, question children as to whether they have left a toy on somewhere, nope, shrug, listen to washing machine dial to see if thats whats clicking, nope, starting to feel paranoid as the clicking noise is in whichever room I go in, start to wonder if coming form inside my own head, gets kids to listen in one ear, no I'm joking! But still the clicking continues, bend down to pick up wooden brick from floor and come face to face with the little drawstring bits on the bottom of my sweatshirt jacket, they click together. Its been two little plastic drawstring ends clicking together as I walk round the house, thats why it stopped when I did...

The vacuum cleaner seemed to lose suction recently, gave it a shake, nope, checked the bag, nope, cleaned that out a few days ago, took the head off and stuck a straw through it to see if it was blocked, nope, took the pipe bits apart and peered through them up to the light, nope not that, check the little filter bit , thats seems clean too. Lolly walks past and asks whats the matter with the vacuum,
"Suctions low" I reply,
"Have you tried turning it up?"
"Huh, turning it up?" I stare blankly at her, she sighs, reaches down and turns a dial on the top of the machine, who knew it had a dial? How long have I had this cleaner and didnt realise it had a dial, why would you turn a vacuum down? I guess one of the tiddlers turned it down, baby tom is my prime suspect!